Pulseblend Times

Tuesday, November 3, 2026Est. 2026 · Bradenton, FL · Worldwidepulseblendstudios.com ↗

BPulseblend Times

All the news that’s fit to remix.

Front Page Music Love & Gifts World Faith & Family About

BREAKING

Pulseblend Times

A satire and music-news outlet founded in November 2026 by Vladimir Tokarev, songwriter, producer and founder of Pulseblend Studios®. Pulseblend Times is part of Pulseblend Studios®. We make up the news so the songs can get the attention they deserve.

About the founder Custom songs from $24.99

Listen to Pulseblend

Spotify Apple Music YouTube Music Amazon Music Deezer Pulseblend Radio 24/7 on YouTubeAlso on TIDAL, Pandora, iHeartRadio and 150+ platforms

Follow Pulseblend Times

Instagram TikTok Facebook X (Twitter)YouTube Pinterest

Follow Pulseblend Studios®

pulseblendstudios.com YouTube Instagram TikTok Facebook X (Twitter)Threads Pinterest LinkedIn Snapchat Pulseblend For Kids

All stories

How Vladimir Tokarev Built Pulseblend Studios® and Launched Pulseblend Times Lighthouse Swaps Foghorn for a Pulseblend™ Track; Fishing Fleet Now Docks in Perfect Choreography Man Orders Custom Song to Apologize to His Sourdough Starter; Starter Rises 4 Feet, Demands Royalties Houseplants Left Alone With Pulseblend Radio for Two Weeks Form Underground Rave, Elect Ficus as Resident DJ Nation’s Dogs Formally Reject End of Daylight Saving Time, Demand Breakfast at ‘Real’ 6 A.M.Pumpkin Spice Announces Retirement Two Days After Halloween, Commissions Farewell Power Ballad Friendsgiving Group Chat Reaches 847 Unread Messages Debating Who Brings the Rolls; Only a Custom Song Restores Peace Man Begins Rehearsing for Year-End Streaming Recap a Month Early, Streams Pulseblend 400 Times to ‘Seem Cultured’Stores Begin Playing Holiday Music on Nov. 1; Floridians Hear ‘Let It Snow’ in 86-Degree Heat and File Complaint Neighborhood Leaf Blowers Form Dubstep Band, Play Saturday Mornings at 7 A.M. Without Being Asked Nation Spends Extra Daylight Saving Hour Entirely on Pulseblend Radio; Clocks Refuse to Go Back Further Leftover Halloween Candy Goes on Strike, Demands to Be Replaced by Something People Actually Want Black Friday Sales Now Begin in Early October; Retailers Confirm Black Friday 2027 Is “Already Underway”Turkeys Nationwide Commission Farewell Ballads Ahead of Thanksgiving; Studio Reports Surge in “Gobble-Core” Orders Local Cat Files Royalty Claim Over Club Hit ‘Meow,’ Demands 50% Writer Share Man Who Gave Wife a Custom Song Now Legally Required to Win Every Anniversary Forever Florida Residents Vote to Make ‘Florida State Of Mind’ the Official Mood; Humidity Abstains Greek Gods Demand Royalties After Appearing on ‘Gods of Light’; Zeus Furious He Wasn’t on the Album Pulseblend Radio Has Been Live 24/7 Since October; Engineers Admit They No Longer Know How to Turn It Off Toddlers Nationwide Can Now Recite All Six Days of Creation; Parents Blame Catchy Bible Songs Orchestra Made Entirely of One Man Named Vladimir Sells Out Every Seat in Concert Hall That Doesn’t Exist Scientists Confirm Custom Birthday Songs Are ‘Unfairly Effective’ After Grandmother Cries for 40 Minutes Man Spends Entire Weekend Registering 244 Songs With Royalty Agencies, Emerges From Spreadsheet ‘A Different Person’Pulseblend Times Founder Announces All Future News Will Be Delivered as Dubstep

Pulseblend Times publishes satire and parody. All articles, quotes, events and people other than Vladimir Tokarev are fictional; any resemblance to real events is coincidental and probably a song idea. Photos of Vladimir Tokarev are used with his permission. Pulseblend Studios® is a registered trademark; Pulseblend™ is a trademark of Pulseblend Studios LLC. © 2026 Pulseblend Studios LLC.