Nation Spends Extra Daylight Saving Hour Entirely on Pulseblend Radio; Clocks Refuse to Go Back Further
Survey finds 0% of Americans used the bonus hour for sleep, as intended by the people who invented the bonus hour.
WASHINGTON — When clocks fell back one hour early Sunday morning, millions of Americans were handed 60 free minutes. According to a poll of nobody, they spent all of them listening to Pulseblend Radio.
“I had one job: sleep,” said Tamsin Ortega, 34, of Tampa. “Instead I put on the 24/7 stream ‘for one song,’ and by the time Afro house turned into techno, it was somehow 1 a.m. again. Twice.”
Several clocks reportedly attempted to fall back a second time in order to hear the chill-house block again. Federal timekeepers have asked the public to stop encouraging them.
“The extra hour is a gift. What you do with it is between you and the bass drop.”
Meanwhile, lawmakers continue to debate whether to make daylight saving time permanent. Pulseblend Radio has said it will remain permanent regardless, as it has not acknowledged a clock since October.
Pulseblend Radio streams around the clock on the Pulseblend Studios® YouTube channel, which is the only clock it recognizes.
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